Lest we forget. Let me take you back to thursday the 7th of June 2007. The Tartan Overlord called for an emergency session in Holyrood to read out and answer questions pertaining to a 'memorandum of understanding' that Tony Blair, the then PM, had signed with Col Gaddafi in Libya about an exchange between each countries nationals held in the other country's prison. As we all know, there was only one Libyan national held in a Scottish prison.
Blair, his spin doctors and lackeys in the British media kicked up an almighty fuss claiming that this was nothing to do with Mr Al Megrahi. The Libyans went on record saying that Megrahi's case was the whole point of the meeting. Gaddafi's son claimed "When Blair came here we signed the agreement. We signed an oil deal at the same time. The commerce and politics and deals were all with the prisoner transfer agreement."
The Unionists in the Scottish Parliament for the one and only time in nearly four years agreed unanimously that Blair had no right to make decisions which directly affected the process of Scots law without consultation with the devolved Parliament. Within hours the London knives were out for Jack McConnell for having the temerity to agree with Salmond.
BBC Newsnight brought out the big guns in its defence of Blair and unleashed Kirsty Wark on an unsuspecting nation.
The question posed was simple, which government was telling the truth the British, Scottish or Libyan?
Now thanks to Julian Assange, we know. Libya and Scotland were telling the truth. The discredited Labour Party in England and Scotland were guilty of lying to the electorate, their friends in the media were guilty of bombast, disinformation and promoting the lies of their friends.
When will Richard Baker, Iain Gray, Tony Blair, Douglas Alexander, David Miliband, David Cameron, Gordon Brown, Jim Murphy, David Cairns, Elaine Murray, David Mundell, Russell Brown, Tavish Scott and Annabel Goldie apologise to the Scottish and British electorate?
Sooo according to this mornings Sunday Times, our newly friendly hugs and kisses Tory Party are considering a re-brand of their vile loathsome former selves, in order to appeal to those who think Scottish Tories are really quite fluffy and cuddlesome. Given the baggage of Thatcher, mass unemployment, poll tax, a pre-election convenient war..sorry that should read 'conflict', social deprivation etcetera I imagine most activists will be panting like a priest at a school pantomime. How do they get this supposed abandoning of the London Party over on the doorstep, without being seen as advocating Independence?
So where do you stand on the minimum booze price now Ms Goldie?
I suppose now that they've finally decided that after being humped at the ballot box for the third time, in which they've been represented by a porcine former furniture salesman and a chap apparently known to his intimates as Fluffy, that the end of the road has been well and truly met.
Holding his breath between elections...
All that remains is for them to find a name that fits in with small 'C' conservatism and a slavish devotion to all that emanates from London that they can slap a bit of tartan on. I'm thinking the Tartan Twunts. All other suggestions welcomed.
Tartan Twunts on a piss up.
However, one question remains. In the battle for supremacy in this axis of couthyness who will emerge victorious, Annabel Goldie, the ma Broon of her generation, David Mundell, the man who thinks the Holyrood Tories are clueless or the parties Scottish Chairman, the former Washington based spook Andrew Fulton who was forced to stand down after his MI6 connections were revealed when he was the deputy director of the Lockerbie Trial Briefing Unit?
In order to pull the wool over the Scottish electorates eyes successfully, might I suggest that the Scottish Conservatives do something more than changing your name and plopping on a 'see you Jimmy' ginger bunnet on one of your ugly young activists.
Perhaps dropping plans for the farcical Calman Commission and sensibly, like many of the more pleasant Tories of my acquaint (yes there are some) who quietly agree that full fiscal autonomy is the way to wean Scotland from the public purse teat, might be a more sensible approach to the new politics...
However, at the end of the cliché I would warrant this, if you want to know what kind of Scot your more rabid Tory is, simply have a keek under his kilt. You wont be surprised.
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