Baron Blowhard. Student-Councillor-MP-Lord-MSP-Sponger.

The Baron has spent the last 24 hours harassing journalists in an attempt to deflect criticism away from the worst outbreak of trough swilling fever since time began. He's been on BBC News 24, Radio Scotland's Morning Extra, The Today Programme on Radio 4 and even poor old Jeremy Vine's Radio 2 show.

His modus operandi has been very simplistic, attack the interviewers when they pursue the question of rule bending trouser filling, ask how much they as public employees earn and then rubbish them as a waste of his taxes. His taxes? The tax he pays is taken from the pay WE give him. The man has spent a lifetime sucking at the public teat.

A look at his biography finds a trail leading from private school to University to councillor, MP, Lord and finally MSP and court jester.



He attended fee paying Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' School alongside such hard-line socialists as Leon Brittan, Simon Schama, Sir Nicholas Serota and Brian Sewell.



Through to Edinburgh University, where he skipped on to the gravy train, after graduation and became full time President of the Scottish Union of Students.



After his presidency of SUS, he became Rector’s Assessor to the Rector of Edinburgh University and then from 1975-79 as Assessor from the Lothian Regional Council on the University Court.

Thankfully he also managed to get himself elected as a councillor in Edinburgh local government in May 1970. He was Vice-Chairman of Education and Bailie (Magistrate) on Edinburgh City Council, on which he served from l970 to l975.

In 1974, the Baron was elected to Lothian Regional Council where he was Chair of the Education Committee of the Council, of COSLA and of the Scottish Teachers Salaries and Conditions of Service Committee.

Ironically, he was also on the boards of Fettes College, Heriot’s and the Merchant Company and, more appropriately, Napier, Telford and Sighthill Colleges. He was a member of the General Teaching Council (GTC) and Chair of the Scottish Adult Literacy Agency.

He stood, unsuccessfully, for Parliament in West Edinburgh in June 1970 and in Edinburgh Pentlands in October l974 and was finally elected in South Ayrshire on 3rd May l979, when he defeated sitting MP Jim Sillars who had left Labour to form the Scottish Labour Party.

Fast forward to the end of the Baron’s life as an MP and we find a very wealthy man.

In 2005, he sold one Edinburgh property and bought another in the capital for £305,000 without a mortgage. He sold his home in Ayrshire for £600,000 - a deal that made him a £400,000 profit - and bought a cottage in Maybole for £280,000, again without a loan.

Then we discover that over a two-year period he claimed £45,000 for renting a London flat that his own mother left him in her will. That he had lived in since 1980, when his mother bought it. Naturally during the period 1980 to 2005 he also claimed expenses on that flat.

I'll not go into his drunken assualt on an old lady in London or his alleged touching relationships with the demi monde of Calton Hill or Ayr seafront.



Suffice it to say that, when it comes to lectures on fucking the public purse, Baron George Von Foulkes has no equal.

SCOTTISH LABOUR POLITICIAN OF THE DECADE

After much consideration and heavy thought as to which Scottish Labour Politician has proved themselves the most capable, intelligent, adroit, fleet of foot and mind, a politician with an uncanny ability to look in the mirror and foretell the future. I have come to the conclusion that although there are many worthy contenders, all with their own special idiosyncrasies, the one man (sorry ladies) who has shown that he has the chameleon like qualities of a spectre, a shift shaper, a man with the ability to melt into the background and read the runes of public disquiet, I present you with none other than the former Labour MP for Glasgow East, Mr. David Marshall



Mr Marshall, sitting in one of the safest Labour seats, as we all know left the troughs of Westminster last year citing 'stress' as his illness.

Was it stress brought about by the gargantuan task of overturning the morass of poverty, ill health, unemployment, alcohol and drug dependency rates or did our latter day Nostrodamus, look into the runes and discover that the raping of the public purse could only last for a fleeting few moments more?

Farewell David Marshall, may you enjoy your MP pension and additional entitlements into a long lasting old age.

Trough swilling at its finest

Ordinarily, I wouldn't bother doing a straight copy 'n' paste, however on this occasion my hat is off to Telegraph for going through the expenses of the Speaker of the House of Commons and Labour MP for Springburn. Father of Paul Martin Labour MSP for.....yep you guessed it Glasgow Springburn. Nothing like a family dynasty of trough swillers. Paul of course received all the air miles his dear old dad accrued when on publicy paid flights. He didn't declare it on his allowances, but don't worry, nobody prosecuted him...



For those of you who missed it on The Telegraph, read on and curse your misfortune for not getting on the gravy train.

Michael Martin: Speaker spent £1,400 on chauffeurs to his local job centre and Celtic Park

Michael Martin spent more than £1,400 on a chauffeurs in his Glasgow constituency, including journeys to the local job centre and to Celtic Park, the home of Celtic football club.

The disclosures are embarrassing for Mr Martin who as Speaker of the Commons has been spending hundreds of thousands of pounds trying to stop the details of the expenses claims being published.

Mr Martin spent more than £1,400 with a Scottish chauffeur hire company in 2004-05. He used it on 12 occasions.

For each of its customers, the company provides a driver wearing a uniform of a grey suit and grey cap. Mr Martin chose to hire a standard saloon car, which the company said would have been either a Jaguar XF, Volvo S80 or a Mercedes E-Class vehicle.

The claims show that on July 23 2004 Mr Martin took a chauffeur-driven car to Springburn Job Centre. The charge for the eight-hour day was £173.90 for a 40-mile round-trip.

The visits during that year also included three journeys to social housing projects in the city.

They included a trip on September 10 2004 to North Glasgow Housing Association. Overall the 32-mile journey took three-and-half hours and cost £97.62.

On another occasion, Mr Martin took a car to John Smith House, the head office of the Labour Party in Glasgow. The driver waited outside, and eventually billed Mr Martin for £64.11.

Mr Martin was also driven by the company from his home, via Celtic Park – where the driver waited – and on to the Glasgow Hilton, at a cost of £100.53 on March 6 2004.

Receipts filed with the fees office show that the account with the company was organised by Mr Martin's office in the House of Commons.

Mr Martin's details also show that he claimed nearly £290 for a two-night stay in April 2006 at the Culloden Hall Estate and Spa, one of the finest 5-star hotels in Northern Ireland. The Culloden's website describes the hotel, on the wooded slopes of the Holywood Hills overlooking Belfast Lough as "built for a bishop... fit for a king".

Mr Martin's expenses claims as the MP for Glasgow North East also show he claimed for the near-full food allowance on his second home during the summer holidays.

In one year – 2007-08 – he charged £2,200 for his food, including £1,050 in July, August and September 2007, when for the most part MPs are not meant to be claiming on their second home.

The Speaker also charged new "Aristocrat" carpets to the taxpayer, costing £1,834, at his constituency home in Glasgow as well as another £1,490 on the cost of redecorating a room.

Mr Martin left the taxpayer with a Rentokil bill for nearly £3,000 and charged for a £285 rug, the claims show. He also claimed £200 for employing someone to tidy his garden and £205 for gutter cleaning.

A spokesman for Mr Martin said: "There are certain circumstances that require Mr Martin to be driven.

He does not use government cars which would be more expensive for the infrequency of these occasions."

She said the fees office "permits the use of taxis for travel within the constituency on parliamentary business".

She said the new carpet was permitted by Commons' authorities. The stay in the hotel had been approved under Commons rules.

Profile: Michael Martin

Job: Speaker of the House of Commons

Salary: £138,724

Total second home claims

2004-05: £6,106

2005-06: £9,551

2006-07: £17,346

2007-08: £11,750

Scottish television from Newcastle!

Soooooo, here's a story. This week we've seen Party Political Broadcasts (PPB's) from all the major parties.

BBC Scotland have shown us Brown holding hands with Obama, whom I presume is standing in the forthcoming Euro elections. Murphy and Iain Gray got a mention, as did lots of snide comments about divorce and seperation.



However, here in the land of the Doonhamer a quick glance at this weeks TV schedule showed a strange anomaly. Border TV who no longer operate from Carlisle and have been subsumed within Tyne Tees to make Tyne Tees and Border ITV, made a boo boo. Based over in Newcastle they supposedly serve the circa 250,000 grumbling jocks in the Dumfries & Galloway and the Scottish Border regions, giving us a few moments of opt out TV as a sop to the OFCOM considerations, that they purportedly represent their viewers with local news and issues.




Therefore it was with some disquiet this week that I discovered that Border had decided not to show the SNP Party PPB and instead planned on showing the UKIP one. By doing so they disenfranchise a a sizeable number of SNP members, voters and future voters of seeing their countries democratically elected governments views on the life politic.



Vociferous emails were sent and sense finally prevailed. All well and good, but what is the point in having a regional TV company, part of the mahoosive ITV franchise that gives a few moments opt out reportage to a sizeable number of people in another country. Put it this way, the distance between Stranraer and Newcastle is similar to the distance between Stranraer and Dundee.

It's time for a distinct Scottish Digital broadcasting channel which can serve all the people of Scotland.

Paul McBride - QC I put it to you Sir, is still the biggest liar in the Scottish Legal System

http://www.sundaymail.co.uk/news/scottish-news/2009/05/03/exclusive-legal-aid-chief-arrested-with-rent-boy-in-shopping-centre-toilet-78057-21328394/


Sooooooo, the head of legal services at the Scottish Legal Aid Board (SLAB) is caught by police getting interior design tips from a convicted rent boy inside a toilet cubicle built for one and Paul McBride QC thunders that there is not enough evidence to convict.

Without being too graphic, the Legal Aid chappy was discovered by the Glasgow polis on his hunkers on a toilet floor presumably looking at the fine examples of art decor on the St Enoch centre bog tiles, whilst his young companion, in an excitable state of undress was gripped with the moment and explaining about how the colour of his home soft furnishing matched that of his boxer shorts. The polis and security guards obviously mistook the proximity of the two chappies in the loo for a passionate tryst, best kept for behind chintz curtains and not particularly best suited in a public place, and subsequently huckled them.

Naturally the policemen and Security guards who gave their time to make witness statements and the rather hard pressed procurator fiscal who deemed there was a case to answer, must have been a tad nonplussed when McBride with his keen analytical mind trumped their eyewitness reports with the astounding revelation that there was "not enough evidence to convict!"

The young scallywag who it is further alleged, was helping to clear a phlegm blockage in Mr Heggarty's windpipe with his priapic member was of course being defended by a run of the mill legal aid funded solicitor. Mr Heggarty was defended by McBride, the chap who Cathy Jamieson appointed to the legal Aid Board in 2007 for a four year term the remuneration for this hard job is a mere £8,328 for about three and a half days’ work a month. In 2006-7 McBride took £379,000 in legal aid fees.

Nice to see that the legal world in Scotland has its priorities right. When one of it's number is caught up in a scandal, be it for smuggling drugs up your snatch into prison, drunk driving, serious assault, attempted murder, inciting religious intolerance by singing songs of bigotry or merely paying a young man for sex in a public toilet, they will always defend their own and deem the charge to have insufficient evidence for conviction...Ach well I suppose Mr Haggarty can frame his written warning and put it on his office wall when he returns to publicly funded work, he's only been off on a sicky since he was caught in this delicate situation in January.

HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY SCOTTISH GOVERNMENT

How many governments reach their midterm as a minority government only to find they're more popular than when they started out?

Answers on a fat Geordie Unionist's forehead in BiC pen...

Nationalists Sieze Control

Once normality is restored and Scotland is once again an independent country, able to do its own thing, there should be plenty of work for historians to look back at the dying days of Unionism and the use of language in its propaganda.

After reading of more laden bias from the pages of the Hootsman on the Spooksters blog

http://advancedmediawatch.blogspot.com/2009/05/more-censorship-and-biased-reporting.html

I thought I'd go an see if there were any results from the Bannockburn cooncil byelection, A quick search and I discovered the beeb report, no results yet, just that it was taking place.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/tayside_and_central/8026700.stm

I read the article, and was drawn to the last paragraph which contained the following:

"The Nationalists seized control of the local authority in March last year following a vote of no confidence in the ruling Labour group."




Now the use of 'nationalists seized control' sounded familiar to the reporting of the SNP assuming control of Dundee City Council in March when the 70 something Labour Lord Provost decided it was unfair that the largest party on the council had no chairs of any of the council committees and voted with the SNP. Nationalists seize control was the appelation de jour then.

Another search finds this term is most often used historically, during armed uprising, with lives lost on both sides of a struggle. More often than not it is used in the context of 'evil' right wing groups usurping the popular mandate of a democratically elected government, other cases apply to the fall of Ceaucescu in Romania etcetera.

When there is democratic change and Labour become the party in power this is more commonly referred to as "Labour take control" or "Labour win".

Odd isn't it? As I say, a lot of truth and reconciliation once the smooth transition takes place.

15,000 new Mac jobs and the right to have the Saltire on our registration plates. Hold me back

Jimbob Murphy the venerable Secretary for the state of Scotland hits the news today, in the super Soaraway Scoddish Sun.

He's grabbed the front page declaring jobs for all, only possible through the divine working of a Labour government. A closer analysis reveals much of what he claims is a rehash of the old YOP schemes of 30 years ago, when my generation were wiped out of the jobs market.

So rather than receive dole money, if you're between 18 and 24 it's off to Tescos to train how to stack shelves from 10am to 8pm then in six months time, if you're really lucky...you might be kept on, although chances are a fresh 18 year old will be taking your training place.



The other big news, which I seem to recall was an SNP campaign about ten years ago is that Scoddish motorists are finally to be allowed place a saltire on their registration plate and not face penal servitude for identifying with Scotland. In fact I seem to remember Helen Liddle of Airdrie and Adelaide, the then secretary for the state of Scotland actually backed the SNP campaign. It's only taken them ten years to implement it....



Speaking to DVLA Direct, Murphy said: “The Saltire is a proud symbol of Scotland which belongs to every Scottish driver, so it’s right that Scottish drivers here should be allowed to display it on their licence plates, not just separatist drunken drivers of baby raping, planet killing nationalist vehicles.

Independence Referendum "There to be Won"

POLL SHOWS INDEPENDENCE REFERENDUM “THERE TO BE WON”

SUPPORT MOVES AHEAD IN EUROPEAN CONTEXT

New findings of a YouGov poll show that support for Scottish independence moves ahead when the question is put in the context of Scotland being “a member of the European Union in its own right”. In total, 42 per cent back that position, compared to 40 per cent against.

The poll also shows that 35 per cent of Scots are more likely to back Scottish independence if the Tories were to win the next General Election, compared to just 6 per cent who would be less likely – a balance of some six-to-one.

In the independence referendum poll question, support for independence increases by 4 points from the last YouGov poll in March to 37%, with 52% against – the best position in a YouGov poll since September 2008.

SNP Westminster leader Angus Robertson said:

“This poll shows that an independence referendum is there to be won. As we approach the European elections, when people are asked if they want Scotland to be a member of the EU in our own right – as opposed to being represented by the UK government – the answer is positive. And the headline support for independence has also increased by 4 points to the best position in a YouGov poll since last autumn.

“As the UK government arbitrarily axes the Scottish budget by £500 million in the teeth of a recession, it will become ever clearer why Scotland needs to be in charge of our own resources – and with our own voice to protect and promote Scottish interests in Europe.”

SNP President and MEP Ian Hudghton said;

“This poll is an excellent starting point for the SNP as we go into the European election campaign.

“This poll shows voters want Scotland to have a strong independent voice in Europe. A vote for the SNP in June is about giving Scotland that voice, supporting the SNP in fighting for Scottish jobs in Europe and showing that Scotland has what it takes to be at the heart of Europe.”

ENDS

Details of the poll are as follows:

On balance do you think Scotland should…?

Continue to be represented by the UK Government in the European Union - 40%
Be a member of the European Union in its own right and represented by the Scottish Government - 42%
Neither of these - 9%
Don’t know - 9%

In the referendum, the Scottish Government intends to ask people whether they think the Scottish Government should negotiate a new partnership with the United Kingdom so that Scotland becomes an independent country.

Do you agree or disagree that the Scottish Government should negotiate this new partnership?

I AGREE that the Scottish Government should negotiate a new partnership so that Scotland becomes an independent country - 37%
I DO NOT AGREE that the Scottish Government should negotiate a new partnership so that Scotland becomes an independent country - 52%
Don’t know - 11%

Note - In a YouGov poll in January the gap was 26% and in a March YouGov poll it was 20%.

If the Conservative Party were to win the next General Election, would this make you more likely or less likely to back Scottish independence?

Much more likely to back Scottish independence - 24%
Slightly more likely - 11%
Slightly less likely - 3%
Much less likely to back Scottish independence - 3%
No difference – I would back Scottish independence anyway - 14%
No difference – I would NOT back Scottish independence anyway - 34%
Don’t know - 11%

The YouGov poll was commissioned by the SNP and conducted from 21-22 April among 1,020 Scottish adults.

Who's got what it takes?

WE'VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES - POLL CONFIRMS VOTER’S
TRUST IN SNP

NECK & NECK RACE FOR WESTMINSTER

GRAY’S RATINGS WORSE THAN WENDY’S

A new poll by YouGov – and commissioned by the
SNP – has confirmed the voters trust in the SNP
Government is increasing for all elections as
we approach the second anniversary of the SNP’s
historic victory in the 2007 Scottish
Parliamentary elections.

The poll of 1020 people on 21 and 22nd April
2009 shows:

* The SNP increasing its vote in the constituency
and regional votes for the Scottish Parliament

* The SNP vote for Westminster elections increasing
by 12%, bringing the party neck and neck with Labour

* Twice as many people trust the SNP Scottish
Government to focus on their needs and interests as
trust the UK Labour Government

* Alex Salmond’s ratings dwarfing other party leaders
with Iain Gray’s ratings figures not only lower than
Annabel Goldie’s but historically lower than any other
Scottish Labour leader.

* Voters of all parties see the SNP holding the balance
of power in Westminster as a "good thing" for Scotland

Commenting on the poll figures Angus Robertson MP,
SNP Business Convenor and Westminster leader, said:

“This is a sensational poll for the SNP and for Scotland.
As we approach the mid term of the Parliament, they are
the SNP's strongest ratings since last autumn.

“The poll shows that voters across Scotland know that we
have what it takes to focus on their needs and interests
during tough times.

“As the SNP approaches the second anniversary of our
historic election victory, the poll demonstrates a tale
of two governments.

“The SNP’s actions in our first two years in Government
have delivered major improvements in people's lives,
with the council tax frozen, scrapping of small business
rates, the phased abolition of prescription charges, and
investment in jobs and skills under our six-point plan to
support Scotland through the recession.

"By contrast, Labour's £500 million raid on Scottish spending
has set the terms of politics in Scotland, and will galvanise
SNP support further in the European and Westminster elections
to come.

"Labour have let people down with their mismanagement of
the economy and attacks of Scotland's public services.

“Double the number of people trust the SNP Government
over the UK Labour government to be on their side.
The SNP’s support for jobs, skills, training and investment
is clearly recognised by voters as doing everything possible
within our powers to promote recovery from Labour’s
recession and build a strong, sustainable economy and society.”

Commenting on the leadership and First Minister ratings which
confirm Alex Salmond’s support and show the Labour leader with
the worst figures ever,

Mr Robertson said:

“This result shows that people believe Alex Salmond is an
excellent First Minister for all of Scotland - he is more
popular among Labour voters than Iain Gray, and more popular
among Lib Dem voters that Tavish Scott!

“The poll is a personal disaster for Iain Gray – as
Labour’s Scottish leader he is the invisible man, and
totally overshadowed by Jim Murphy and Steven Purcell.

“No Labour leader has ever had such low support from
the Scottish public. When even fewer people want to see
Iain Gray as First Minister than wanted Wendy Alexander,
this is a crisis for his leadership."

Commenting on the voting intentions for Westminster and
the support for the SNP to hold the balance of power at
Westminster Stewart Hosie MP, Convenor of the SNP’s
Westminster Campaign added;

“These dramatic results show voters know the SNP has got
what it takes to provide them with a strong voice at Westminster.

“Labour have lost the trust of the Scottish public.

“With a 12% increase from the 2005 election the SNP is
winning the trust of the Scottish electorate at all levels
whilst Labour is continuing to lose public support and the
LibDems are disappearing from the electoral map.

“There is clear evidence from this poll that voters of
all parties support the SNP holding the balance of power
at Westminster, no matter who is in number 10.

“The SNP in Westminster have got what it takes to see
Scotland’s interests protected, not sacrificed as they
have been under successive Labour and Tory governments and
this poll shows that the Scottish public recognise
our vital role in protecting and promoting their interests."

ENDS

Notes:

Poll details are as follows:

Holyrood Constituency Vote

Party - Poll (Change from last poll) -
[Change from 2007 election]

SNP - 37% (+2%) [+4%]
Labour - 30% (-4%) [-2%]
Tory - 15% (1%) [-2%]
LibDem - 13% (1%) [-3%]
Other - 5% (1%) [3%]

Holyrood Regional Vote

Party - Poll (Change from last poll) -
[Change from 2007 election]

SNP - 37% (+7%) - [+6%]
Labour - 28% (-4%) - [-1%]
Tory - 15% (0%) - [1%]
LibDem - 13% (2%) - [2%]
Other - 7% (-5%) - [-8%]

Westminster voting intentions:

SNP - 30%
Lab - 32%
Tory - 21%
LibDem - 13%
Other - 5%

* Which ONE, if any, of the following Scottish
Political leaders do you think would make the best
First Minister?

Alex Salmond - 36%
Annabelle Goldie - 10%
Iain Gray - 7%
Tavish Scott - 4%
Patrick Harvie - 1%

7% for Iain Gray is the worst figure recorded for a
Labour leader in Scotland since the 2007 election and
probably since polling began.

Wendy Alexander's lowest rating was 9%.

Previous polls on party leader ratings had the following
ratings for Labour leaders:

Apr-09 - 7% - Iain Gray
Mar-09 - 17% - Iain Gray
Jan-09 - 15% - Iain Gray
Oct-08 - 13% - Iain Gray
Sep-08 - 15% - Combined Labour*
Apr-08 - 11% - Wendy Alexander
Nov-07 - 10% - Wendy Alexander
Oct-07 - 9% - Wendy Alexander

* Figures were Iain Gray 3%, Cathy Jamieson 7%,
and Andy Kerr 5%.


* Thinking about the performance of the UK Labour
Government and the Scottish SNP Government over
the past year…

- Which do you think cares MOST about the needs and
interests of you and your family?

Scottish Government - 44%
UK Government - 22%
Neither - 26%
Don’t know - 7%

- On balance, do you think the Labour Party will win
or lose the next UK General Election?

Win - 23%
Lose - 61%
Don’t know - 17%

* It is possible that at the next British general election,
neither the Labour or Conservative Party will win an outright
majority and that other parties, including the Scottish National
Party, could hold the balance of power.

- Do you think this is…?

A good thing for Scotland - 41%
A bad thing for Scotland - 19%
Makes no difference either way - 28%
Don’t know - 13%

Have we got what it takes?

Think so. Showaddywaddy does too.




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkIC629sos0

We've got what it takes.

Posted this on the Hootsman today and was fair flummoxed that it was removed by the Administrator. I reposted it thanks to the previous button and asked why.

Then it dawned on me has anyone ever had an explanation for the Hootsman's bullying censorship?



Finally – Brown says sorry for smeargate

"Finally". I'm loving the use of this term in the headline, it implies that the Hootsman have been indulging in the wailing and gnashing of teeth and pulling of hair in an attempt to make Prudence say sorry for the filth that operates in his front office and cabinet.

I've eschewed all this talk of 'traitors' from some of my independence loving chums, putting it down to some 18th century Walter Scott romanticised view of morals versus citizenship. Now after watching Broon's attack dogs slebber all over Scotland yesterday, particularly the toadying, loathsome creep that is Jim Murphy, I can see the fascination and application of the word is quite applicable.

Michty! Scottish Labour Sex Scandal Surely Not...

Scottish Labour politician in Shrek like tryst, naw, say it ain't so...




Sunday Hootsman should be busy...

SCOTTISH LABOUR PURE HATE TOURISTS SO THEY DO.

So, in circumstances I'd rather not go into, I recently found myself reading the Daily Retard. Having long given up any thoughts on finding actual news, I was most perplexed to discover yet another jibe by Labour at Homecoming 2009.

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/2009/04/15/sean-connery-homecoming-advert-cost-more-than-slumdog-millionaire-claim-86908-21279498/


This time Labour tourism spokesman Lewis Macdonald, (you'll recognise him below, he's the one that permanently looks as if he's curling off a skittery three pounder) declared that the Homecoming advert cost more per minute than Oscar winning movie Slumdog Millionaire.


Speaking like a man with shares in Imodium, Mr McDonald claimed the advert cost £233,450 for its 59 seconds, versus Slumdog which cost £28,000 per minute. So far so curious. Thankfully an anonymous Telly insider was able to provide Magnus Gardham, the Retard's political editor, with some shocking FACTS!

He/she said: "The ad could have been made for £2000."

"It would have looked big budget if they'd spent £20,000."

Jings, I thought, 'a sixty second advert of wondrous quality, with an excellent song, jam packed with Scoddish slebs for £2,000, what colour is the sky in this "insiders" world?

Now having been involved in the 'glamorous' world of telly production for a wheen of years, I pondered, at the costs, thankfully the article explained that the rights to the song cost £15,000. For a whole year, pretty darn good. I once enquired about using a 30 second burst of Charles Trenet's 'La Mer' a TV project and was quoted a price of £7,000 for 10 seconds...and that was nearly 20 years ago...However, I digress...I then happened upon BBC Scotland, lapping up this mince like a cake hungry chum slut. Using the rather ambiguous headline,

SNP ad 'cost more than Slumdog'

'Mmm', thought I, an 'SNP ad'. What like a Party Political broadcast? Then like Douglas Fraser's last expenses claim to The Herald, the actual cost rose to a ginormous £559,287

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/7999044.stm

Ah but that includes the marketing, promotion and rather importantly the transmission costs in various foreign markets. They then inform us that Mr McDonald was actually wrong that Slumdog in reality cost £10 million pounds rather than the £3million he bandied about like free toilet paper.

This is where my previous experience in production costs come in handy. Low budget films that you have seen in the cinema did not cost the pennies the producers tell you they did, that is part of the marketing mince they want you to buy into.

Reservoir Dogs, Desperado, Do the Right Thing, all done on deferred payments and credit cards. B-O-L-L-O-C-K-S. Each one of these films and Slumdog were party to massive investments in marketing. Slumdog Millionaire was distributed in the US by Fox Searchlight, when they put out a film on US general release in 1000's of screens they spend an average of $30 million dollars on promotion and marketingper fillum...and then when it got the Oscar nod, well double that figure. Every dollar spent getting the Oscar, accrues another 10 dollars on DVD sales and merchandising...

Grrr so for Labour to compare the costs for an advert that is designed to encourage tourists to visit and spend money in Scotland (that includes the parts that are still Labour afflicted) you can surmise that my blood is fairly well close to boiling.

Labour you expect this mince from, but for BBC Scotland to claim Homecoming is an 'SNP ad' and then double the price is just downright insidious. Whichever Labour lackey decided this is the path to impartial reporting needs taken out and given a right good shoeing.

'Stop the World - Scotland wants to get on!'

Following the 75th anniversary of the founding of the Scottish National Party and the untimely death of Sir Professor Neil MacFarlane and the approaching second year of the Scottish Government I was pleased to notice that BBC Alba (increasingly becoming the Scottish Broadcasting Council we all need and want) are playing:

'Madame Ecosse'

Produced & Directed by Ishbel MacIver

Producer Morag Stewart

With contributions from

Alex Salmond, Ian Paisley, Tam Dalyell, Michael Russell, Brian Wilson, Angus Brendan MacNeil, Alasdair Allan and Fergus Ewing.

Monday 13^th April at 9pm & Tuesday 14^th April at 10pm

on BBC Alba, Sky Channel 168 & Free Sat channel 110

After five decades in politics spent in three parliaments, Westminster, Europe where she earned her nickname Madame Ecosse and the Scottish Parliament, Winnie has been hailed as a nationalist heroine who is loved by some and loathed by others.

So how did this lawyer become the Grand Dame of Scottish politics and why are we still coming to terms with the effects of her win at Hamilton?


Fly my pretties!

NUJ Scotland boss in racist attack on ENGLISH Editors. Shocker...read all about it full colour pages 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8, and 17.

There was an article in the Press Gazette on April 1st that had me checking the fallibility of my gullibility monitor. Under the headline " SCOTTISH JOURNALISTS ARE 'NOT COPING', MP's TOLD" I read with a tear in my een, how hard bitten Scottish journalists have developed a dose of the wibbles in the current economic armageddon.

Chunky bearded Liverpudlian Paul Holleran, 58, the National Union of Journalists' Scottish organiser, was asked by chairman Mohammad Sarwar MP at the Scottish affairs committee how journalists were coping.

Everton fan Holleran, with his lip all a quiver, replied: "They’re not coping. I carried out a surgery the other week, and had people from 9am to 6.15pm, complaining about new contracts, new working conditions, the pressure they have been put under.

"I was getting reports of senior people in tears at The Herald. What epitomises the loss of morale is when I met with the managing director of Newsquest after their announcement, he said we want between 30 and 40 journalists to go.

"They had 51 volunteers. That tells you the level of morale."

Yep, the recession is hitting Scottish journos hard. The clichéd view of the hard drinking, hard man Scottish journalist is impacting on this generation who are oft seen crying into their expenses fuelled Mojitos whilst twittering on their Blackberries about how evil their bosses are to them...

So what's at the bottom of this crisis which has seen men and women of letters polish up their CV's and sit up and beg, salivating at the prospect of moving from editor posts at National daily's to Media Communication jobs with North Lanarkshire District Council?

Chunky bearded Liverpudlian Paul Holleran, 58, father of three has the answer.
Sarwar asked why circulation was dipping. Hunky bearded Liverpudlian Paul Holleran, 58, father of three, Everton fan, cited smaller newsrooms – but also blamed publishers, for appointing ENGLISH EDITORS to Scottish titles, claiming this had not helped.

"In the past five years there have been a number of actions that have impacted on the quality of the newspapers in Scotland," he said.

"I'm talking of a number of appointments where editors originated from south of the Watford Gap, shall we say.

"They were appointed editors of Scottish newspapers without knowing the local patch. That was a big starting point.

"They're trying to regain that momentum. However, during that period, as profitability of these titles has gone up – and it has gone up, quite dramatically - they have closed a number of correspondents.

"There's a lack of coverage of European Parliament, in Brussels and Strasbourg, the number of columnists has gone down, there's less diversity. That's part of the problem of falling circulation."

Chunky bearded Scouser Paul Holleran, 58, father of three, with a twinkle in his eye, also cited competition from English papers with Scottish pages, especially the "cut-price" Daily Star and Sun.

Sooooooooo appointing English editors with a 'British' perspective to Scottish titles has not worked. The endless torrent of anti-SNP headlines and stories in the Hootsman, Herald, Daily Labour and faux Jock blatts has merely brought about a paradigm shift in the Scottish electorate and has seen the "Nationalists Seize Control" of holyrood and Local Authorities the length and breadth of Alba.

When all this is done and dusted and Scotland is once again a normal Independent country, a major thesis on the impact of propaganda emanating from "South of the Watford Gap" originated editors needs to be done. Colour me bemused.

What a task. Pick a few phrases that reflect the new Scotland...

So, as we begin the process of recognising ten years of the Parliament building, the presiding officer, Alex Fergusson has suggested it is time that we add another voice to the 24 writers whose words celebrate Scotland, are carved on the Canongate wall.

Of the snippets already there, Hugh MacDiarmid's 'Scotland Small?' is a personal favourite. Although it is carved in obscure text and difficult to see.





Scotland Small?

Scotland small? Our multiform, our infinite Scotland small ?
Only as a patch of hillside may be a cliché corner
To a fool who cries ‘Nothing but heather!’ where in September another
Sitting there and resting and gazing round
Sees not only the heather but blaeberries
With bright green leaves and leaves already turned scarlet,
Hiding ripe blue berries; and amongst the sage-green leaves
Of the bog-myrtle the golden flowers of the tormentil shining;
And on the small bare places, where the little Blackface sheep
Found grazing, milkworts blue as summer skies;
And down in neglected peat-hags, not worked
Within living memory, sphagnum moss in pastel shades
Of yellow, green, and pink; sundew and butterwort
Waiting with wide-open sticky leaves for their tiny winged prey;
And nodding harebells vying in their colour
With the blue butterflies that poise themselves delicately upon them,
And stunted rowans with harsh dry leaves of glorious colour.
‘Nothing but heather!’ - How marvellously descriptive! And incomplete!

However, the one that sums up a Scotland that is now thankfully on its last feet is the wondrous 'Scotland' by Alastair Reid, of New York, the Dominican Republic and Whithorn, also one of the finest men to ever draw breath, and whose company I've spent many a happy hour in.




Scotland

It was a day peculiar to this piece of the planet,
when larks rose on long thin strings of singing
and the air shifted with the shimmer of actual angels.
Greenness entered the body. The grasses
shivered with presences, and sunlight
stayed like a halo on hair and heather and hills.
Walking into town, I saw, in a radiant raincoat,
the woman from the fish-shop. ‘What a day it is!’
cried I, like a sunstruck madman.
And what did she have to say for it?
Her brow grew bleak, her ancestors raged in their graves
as she spoke with their ancient misery:
‘We’ll pay for it, we’ll pay for it, we’ll pay for it.’

Then again, MacDiarmid's diatribe against moral turpitude, fair gets the hairs up on the back of your neck.

"My aim all along has been (in Ezra Pound's term) the most drastic desuetization of Scottish life and letters, and, in particular, the de-Tibetanization of the Highlands and Islands, and getting rid of the whole gang of high mucky-mucks, famous fatheads, old wives of both sexes, stuffed shirts, hollow men with headpieces stuffed with straw, bird-wits, lookers-under-beds, trained seals, creeping Jesuses, Scots Wha Ha'evers, village idiots, policemen, leaders of white-mouse factions and noted connoisseurs of bread and butter, glorified gangsters, and what 'Billy' Phelps calls Medlar Novelists (the medlar being a fruit that becomes rotten before it is ripe),Commercial Calvinists, makers of 'noises like a turnip', and all the touts and toadies and lickspittles o the English Ascendancy, and their infernal women-folk, and all their skunkoil skulduggery. "

Can a Gray mouse lead a white mouse faction?

Curious George and the lost spirit of honesty.

Following last weeks own 'special' brand of stupid from Dumfries and Galloway Labour MP ickle Russell Brown (above), attacking SNP Culture Minister Mike Russell for a book written 11 years ago. One would have rightly thought, that after sense prevailed, and intelligent people who had actually read the book, acclaimed it as an honest warts and all assessment of Scotland after 18 years of Tory rule, and as a condemnation of decades of Labour incompetence in running civic Scotland, the fuss would have been consigned to the bin marked, 'further puerile Labour rubbish'.




Alas and alack no, as has been mentioned elsewhere, this week brought forward the spectacle of Baron George Foulkes of Cumnock (seen above lying in a near comatose state, in the back of his Ministerial limousine, after being arrested for drunk and disorderly behaviour in ThatLondon) through the keyboard of his well nourished Gollum, Kezia (when will she drop the dale from her name?) Dugdale (yes I know boo hiss, what a sexist blah blah-tough) proferring the following motion to the Scottish Parliament:

S3M-03621 George Foulkes (Lothians) (Lab): That the Parliament calls on the Minister for Culture, External Affairs and the Constitution to retract his derogatory remarks about parts of Glasgow, Aberdeen, Edinburgh, Stirling and Lanarkshire, made in his book, In Waiting: Travels in the Shadow of Edwin Muir, in October 1998; in particular calls on the minister to retract the comments that imply that Glasgow is too dangerous to get out of a car and that tenement closes are covered with the bodies of unconscious drug addicts, that describe the flag on Edinburgh Castle as “an awful mutant tablecloth”, that suggest that Dumfries is full of “skinny, ill-dressed women”, that Aberdeen is inhospitable and that Stirling is undesirable, and believes that it is against the interests of Scotland to have a minister who is responsible for promoting Scotland and its culture to be seen to continue to hold these views.




Now to just drop a further bogie into Kezia's slimfast Muligatawny soup, let me just proffer the following review from The Glasgow Herald (as was) dated December 9 1998, under the heading:

BOOK of the DAY

reviewed by

Vi Hughes

On page 18 weighing in at 409 words, fighting out of Neil Wilson Publishing for a reasonable £9.99

IN WAITING: TRAVELS IN THE SHADOW OF EDWIN MUIR

by Michael Russell

REFRESHINGLY, Michael Russell, chief executive of the SNP, speaks also as a private person as he looks at Scotland in these past few months before the birth of its Parliament. His new book is loosely based on Edwin Muir's Scottish Journey of 1935. Russell conducts a sort of dialogue with the famous poet and thinker that enriches and deepens his own book.
His aim was "to escape from the straitjacket of day to day politics and to indulge in the luxury of visiting and thinking about the country and its people, trying to learn from them what my country is about, and what it wants to be". Russell travels the length of the country. Unlike Muir, his work did not allow him one sustained period of travel, but his various sorties to different areas, by car, train, bus, or ferry, at least allowed him to observe the failings of Scottish transport services, particularly in outlying regions.
He starts with Edinburgh where he has only a day to spend . . . no chance of emulating Muir's unsurpassed portrait of that beautiful and exasperating city. He talks to two unemployed teenagers, inarticulate on the topic of Scottish politics, a vinegary lady in the Botanical Garden cafe who thinks that London is the place for "the Parliament", some "mean-faced old men" in a pub, and lastly, thank goodness, meets John, a joiner, who really cares and looks forward with hope to a new life after May next year.
In Kirkcudbright, a visit to his old school inspires reflection on the failing state of education. In Glasgow and Lanarkshire his writing gains force, fuelled by a mixture of anger at what the ravages of industrialism have done to people's lives, and concern at how little has been done to repair that damage. Muir's description of the devastated areas, quoted in the book, shocks him with its relevance to conditions today.
The book contains the inevitable bit of Labour/SNP knockabout and, alas, some shallow anti-English stuff. There are also one or two misunderstandings about Edwin Muir. But in expressing his own humanity and compassion Russell acknowledges that his party has no monopoly on such feelings. It is this belief that lends a positive note to his conclusion - that the new Parliament could and should help evolve "a politics of ideas and principles . . . " that would "serve Scotland much better".

Now the above is a warts and all copy and paste of the original review, I could have taken out the comment about "shallow anti-English stuff." But, I'm not into covering up honest warts and all analysis, or selecting or burying quotes out of context. I would add that Vi Hughes who reviewed the book is an Australian author of quite excellent childrens literature, and may not have understood that Mike Russell is English born....

Anyhoo, back to the Baron, this lover of all things liquid and bi-legged, is without doubt one of the most effective tools the SNP have on the path to Independence. His rambling comments are of great value for followers of Scottish politics, deliberately!

However, this week, probably in response to the above motion, or as is more likely, as a means of informing the parliament, just exactly how much public money the Baron and Ms Dugdale have cost us Dr Ian McKee submitted the following motion.


S3M-03628 Ian McKee (Lothians) (SNP):

That the Parliament, mindful of the answer to question S3W-17445 by the Minister for Parliamentary Business on 10 November 2008 that the cost of answering a parliamentary question is £98.51, notes that at least one member has asked over 1,000 questions in this parliamentary session, costing a total of over £100,000, and that if all members followed this example that the cost to the taxpayer would be nearly £13 million, or £26 million in a full session, and therefore requests all members to consider whether their question is really necessary before incurring yet more public expense.


So in addition to his numerous members motions (ohh missus) the delightful Baron has cost the Scottish taxpayer £100,000 with his consistent line of Parliamentary drivel, all driven by his belief that the SNP must be as corrupt as his beloved Scottish Labour party. £100,000 spent so far proves that he's still drooling on the leather seats of his ministerial limo...Keep up the good work George, deliberately.

Scotland's independence day

On the day that Broon, fluttered his eyelash, gave big Barak a comehither wink and proclaimed himself the big man on campus, an American journalist wrote something akin to a piece of journalism, we in Scotland have long given up on. An impartial article. Read on and applaud.

* For lurking dependence junkies, be aware that you are being insulted, you just don't know by how much.


ONE OF THE most interesting politicians in Europe these days is a Scot, and I don't mean Gordon Brown. Alex Salmond is the first minister of a devolved Scottish parliament, a creation of Tony Blair's Labor government designed to take the wind out of Scottish separatist sentiments.

A few years ago, however, a ranking member of the British royal family, whose members aren't supposed to get involved with politics, committed an indiscretion by telling me that he thought devolved parliaments were a terrible idea because they could break up the United Kingdom. The Welsh would stay with England, and maybe the Northern Irish, he said, but the Scots probably would not. Salmond, the head of the Scottish National Party, is banking on the royal being right.

After centuries of fighting the English to maintain independence, the two thrones were united when James VI of Scotland became James I of England in 1603, after Elizabeth died childless. In 1707, the two countries were joined under one parliament - the one in London. For the next 300 years, Scotland helped build the British empire, contributed more soldiers per capita to Britain's wars than any other region, invented more things, and had more than its share of prime ministers. Edinburgh became the seat of the Scottish enlightenment, a remarkable burst of creative energy in the late 18th and early 19th centuries. But something of William Wallace, Robert the Bruce, and the independence of yore lingered in the Scottish heart.

Ten years ago, Scotland got its own parliament back, with limited powers. Defense and diplomacy are in London's hands. The Scottish National Party won the election of 2007 by a whisker. Some thought the Scottish Nationalists' minority government would fail, but it hasn't. Neither has Salmond, whose rapier repartee is often on display in the parliamentary put-down that Britons love.

On a recent visit to Edinburgh, I met the first minister in his office in the new Scottish parliament, a startling architectural statement in the tumble-down modern style. An economist by training, Salmond is a big admirer of the late John Kenneth Galbraith and began quoting some of his work from memory.

His plan is to get a referendum on Scottish independence before the people sometime next year. Polls don't show a majority of Scots ready for independence yet, but Salmond believes that they do want the choice. Getting a bill passed on a referendum will be difficult because neither Labor, nor the Tories, nor the Liberal Democrats want any such thing. During my visit, the Scottish edition of the Times of London revealed that in the 1970s the British Labor government went so far as to redraw the boundaries of North Sea oil to deprive Scotland of much of it, and even contemplated stirring up separatists movements in the Scottish isles of Orkney and the Shetlands, should Scotland go independent, to deprive Scotland of even more oil.

Salmond says the nations he looks to for inspiration are Ireland for its lower corporate taxes, the recession notwithstanding; Norway for its stewardship of oil revenues; Finland for education; and the region of Catalonia in Spain for its emphasis on cultural identity. In general, "I tend to like the Scandinavian societies," he said, for the way they balance freedoms and social responsibilities.

Salmond's independent Scotland would keep the monarchy and the English language, although efforts are being made to keep Scottish Gaelic alive. Salmond himself uses old Scots, the language of Robert Burns, when he feels the need to tweak colleagues in the British parliament in London where he also sits. "They know they are being insulted, but not how much," he says.

The SNP's nationalism is based on citizenship, rather than on ethnicity, religion, or language, and is pro-immigration; quite different from many national movements.

Scotland's two biggest banks, Royal Bank of Scotland and Halifax Bank of Scotland, are in deep trouble, but Salmond hopes that even in recession Scots would prefer to have the "same economic teeth" that other nations have, rather than "hang on to the United Kingdom treasury."

Scotland's near neighbors, Ireland, Iceland and Norway, all became independent in the 20th century. Salmond is hoping that Scotland will come into its own early in the 21st.

H.D.S. Greenway's column appears regularly in the Globe.

Rockin' Roddy Piper Hoo haaa!

Excuses unionist parties might come up with against a free vote on an Independence referendum. Part One.

Soooo, in a rather straightforward interview in 'The Politics Show' (North Britain version), wherein MSP Mike Russell Minister for Culture, External Affair and the Constitution (CEAC) posited the suggestion that Holyrood might actually do the nation a service and remind the people that politicians are free thinking individuals, not entirely tied to slavish devotion of their pary and have a free vote to determine whether or not Scotland should hold an Independence referendum.

This brought witless cant from the desperate Unionistas.

Cue Steerpike, deep within the bowels of his Eastwood bunker, "Naw, he's ra minister fur breaking up Britannia."

Followed by Don't ravish Tavish, (adopt regulation plums in mouth, the poor boy makes Betty Windsor sound common), "Oh no, how frightful, we're only interested in getting us poor Scots out of this dreadful recession, dontchaknow?"

Then Bella, the shadow shadow First Minister / Secretary of State for Scotland. " Stop chuntering, your obsessed, let's get on with panning Brown over his recession."

I look forward to the other heavyweights on the Scottish political scene weighing in, and denying a free vote to all MSP's, particularly, TheWendy, Jackie the Hutt, Baron Foulkes and Duncan McNeill. And of course, how could I forget Iain 'Giggety giggety goo' Gray.






Addendum

TheWendy, "Let the people have their say on this matter"


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ipd8JzfUr-E