The Universality of Cheese.: Culture Smack! Ben Nevis, it's a bit of a hill.

Monday, 19 October 2009

Culture Smack! Ben Nevis, it's a bit of a hill.

Dearie me, the publishers of Culture Smart! Scotland, are getting it in the neck from some of the tabloids this morning. Their crime?

Ben Nevis is a "biggish hill"

Loch Ness as a "dull waterway".

Highlanders don't like pork and eat only porridge and Arbroath smokies for breakfast.

Protestants are so bigoted they refuse to have anything green in their homes.

Scots plant rowan trees just to ward off witches.

We regard 'fairies as guide neighbours'

Scotland was once ruled by the 'Steward' dynasty

We're noted for our rudeness and blunt ways, 'To the unprepared their bluntness may seem downright rude. But be warned that these same forthright people can be very touchy and extremely easily offended if you speak to them in the same vein.'

Shetlands Viking pageant is 'Up Helly Ya' bass

Robert Burns had 'nothing much to say about religion.'

The author a London based historian and aptly named John Scotney has apologised. His biography reveals an extremely well educated and probably interesting man. All of which beggars the question, what was he thinking of?

The guid guide is sold mostly in the USA and Canada. Personally I'm surprised there is no mention of our cheese eating terrorist appeasing monkeys or our cringe laden unionists supported by the Loyal Orange brotherhood....

http://www.randomhouse.com/author/results.pperl?authorid=74339&view=full_sptlght

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/article-1221402/Scots-rude-Ben-Nevis-just-big-hill-Loch-Ness-dull-according-new-travel-guide.html

http://www.thesun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/2688373/Tourist-guide-brands-Scots-drunken-bigots.html

4 comments:

Conan the Librarian™ said...: “Oh wad some power the giftie gie us
To see oorsel's as raj gajjy's see us!
It wad frae monie a restriction free us,
To kick their cunts in. Ye Ken"

If Rabbie had came frae Muirhouse...; 19 October 2009 at 14:47
McGonagall said...: What’s a’ your jargon o’ your schools—
Your Latin names for horns an’ stools?
If honest Nature made you fools,
What sairs your grammars?
Ye’d better taen up spades and shools,
Or knappin-hammers.

A set o’ dull, conceited hashes
Confuse their brains in college classes!
They gang in stirks, and come out asses,
Plain truth to speak;
An’ syne they think to reduce Ben Nevis
By dint o’ Cheek!; 19 October 2009 at 16:24
DougtheDug said...: From the article the book does seem a bit quaint with Highlanders not eating pork and people believing in fairies but if you just concentrate on the scenery compared to the Rockies Ben Nevis is a wee hill and Loch Ness is pretty dull. I can say that because I've seen both and been in the Rockies.

If you drive up Loch Ness along the A82 it is just a long winding tree-hemmed road beside the Loch and it is rare but I actually do know someone who was refused entry to a "Protestant" house because they were wearing green trousers and you will find rowan trees beside most old houses in the highlands which were planted for luck.

I'm all for accuracy but it's not good for Scots to get too precious about other nationalities view of us because to an American Ben Nevis is a little hill and if they end up in Glasgow during an Orange Parade they will run smack bang up against the problem of wearing something green.; 20 October 2009 at 21:56
Dark Lochnagar said...: Seems fair enough to me. I know a pub in Kilwinning who barred a regular of 30 years because he bought a green car. Seriously!; 21 October 2009 at 02:14