What's new Pussycat?

A few weeks ago whilst trawling these internets I came across a comment about veteran BBC Reporting Scotland 'news anchor' Jackie Bird having a column in the Sunday Mail. Intrigued I let my fingers do the walking and eventually arrived at the following article.

In her whimsy infused column, the 'Sunday Mail's Jackie Bird' deigns to deliver her views on societies big stories of the week. The above article was written as a response to the startling news that Downing Street had employed the skills of an experienced cat to rid them of their rat problem. Ms Bird, using that as her cue transported the reader to a furry land where Scottish politicians are portrayed as cats. Yoiks what fun!

Here's how our impartial newsreader sees the situation:

Tiger Salmond, the SNP cat: "Look, Larry, my man, in an independent Scotland you would have your rats and we would have ours. Problem sorted. Excuse me, if you don't mind I'll just have another lick of my cream. Now, where was I? Oh yes, in an independent Scotland, cream. Cream for all & cream for every man woman and child, and, of course, cat. There would be cream coming out of the taps, cream in the puddles..."

I like a joke, I love ripping the piss out of pomposity wherever I see it. I think I've developed a sense of what's funny and obversely what's downright insidious. I don't see the above as a light hearted joke at the expense of Salmond. I see it as a yet another in a long line of scathing attacks used by cringe infused Scottish journalists who seek to portray Salmond as being of the chocolate tea pot self munching variety. The idiom of 'the cat who got the cream' is commonly interpreted as being, one who is oh so satisfied and arrogant with themselves and displays an overtly smug mien...Remember in Scotland our journos don't like confident people, mind we kent his faither...

Tabby Gray, the Scottish Labour cat was unavailable, however, we found this statement tied to a lamppost: "Missing - Tabby Gray. Our adorable Tabby disappeared from the Scottish Labour party HQ some time ago.

Now wrap me in tinsel, roll me down a hill and call me a fat Christian, but doesn't the above sound like a plea from the impartial publically funded BBC veteran news reader for the leader of the North British Regional Labour parliamentary group to up his game in the fast approaching Scottish Parliamentary election?

Now some of you may remember that waaaay back in 2003 the BBC big boys in thatLondon got into all sorts of problems when BBC Radio 4 reporter Andrew Gilligan broadcast an item about prospective war criminal Tony Blair and his team of acolytes 'sexing up' the document which led to Dr Kelly's mysterious homo-sui-cide. Gilligan went on to repeat his allegation in his column in the Mail on Sunday. The beeb were simply battered by Blair and Campbell for having the temerity to utter the allegation in the first place, as a sop to stop the bloodletting the Beeb executives decreed that BBC employees could no longer have outside paid gigs. This led to complaints and weapons grade whinging from the likes of Paxman and Humphries. The beeb senior execs stamped their little teeth and roared their little roars and won the day. Their top tier talent were rewarded for loss of outside earnings with eyewatering bonuses and peace settled over Broadcasting House.

So with the fact that BBC broadcasting talent are not supposed to have outside work, particularly that which conflicts with their publically paid work,  in mind I wrote to the BBC Audience Council Scotland  acs@bbc.co.uk, the BBC Scotland Director Ken.MacQuarrie@bbc.co.uk and ACS chairman and BBC board of Governors director Bill.Matthews@bbc.co.uk to let them know my damnable opinion.

This is what I sent

Dear Sir, I am intrigued to discover that BBC Reporting Scotland news ‘anchor’ Jackie Bird has paid employment outside of the corporation which I believe conflicts with her impartial role at the BBC.


Ms Bird writes a column for the Sunday Mail, a profoundly self-avowed pro-Labour newspaper. Her recent 'blog' post for the newspapers online content entitled. 'Claws come out as top cat Larry makes mark.' is diametrically opposed to her unbiased and apolitical role within the BBC.
I include the link below for you to assess for yourself whether her descriptions of both Messrs Salmond and Gray is appropriate for one who is employed to read the news in an unbiased fashion.


http://blogs.dailyrecord.co.uk/jackiebird/2011/02/claws-come-out-as-top-cat-larry-makes-ma.html


I recall that the BBC took a stringent policy stance against their on-screen and on-air talent profiting from their publicly paid profile by moonlighting for private companies. Most notably BBC Reporter Andrew Gilligan and the uproar that followed his freelance ‘sexing up the WMD dossier’ column in the Mail on Sunday caused.


For your reference I include the link to the Guardian’s media column which reports that the BBC Governors resolved to take the initiative to force their presenters to choose between their freelance newspaper columns and their work for the corporation, following a meeting in Cardiff on November 27th 2003.


http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2003/nov/28/pressandpublishing.davidkelly


Surely some seven years on the BBC have not fudged the issue?

yours sincerely


yadda yadda yadda (that's not my real name I'm just a Seinfeld fan)

A week later I received a reply from the very friendly Jackie who works for Mr McQuarrie:

Sent: Wed, 2 Mar 2011 14:40
Subject: FW: Outside earnings for BBC employees.

Dear Mr MacLachlan,

This is to acknowledge your e-mail sent to ACS.

Your e-mail has been forwarded to the Head of News & Current affairs for
his views and a full response will follow.

A week later and no word back, I sent the following:


Dear Jackie,
  Just wondering if there's been any response yet?

regards

Mark

Jackie wrote back within a couple of hours. (I really like her she's very people orientated compared to lots of Beeb wonks.)

Hi Mark - checking this out with colleagues in News and will get back to you asap.
Jackie

So fast forward five days and lo and behold the clouds did part, a mighty rumble was heard in the land and Head of News and Current affairs had cast aside such thoughts of triathlon's and lycra and did reply, here's what he said:

Hi Mark,

Please see below response from Atholl Duncan, Head of News & Current
Affairs.

Jackie


Dear Mr MacLachlan,

Thank you for contacting us regarding Jackie Bird's recent column in the
Sunday Mail. Ms Bird is a freelance journalist and broadcaster.  She is
not a member of BBC staff.  She earns her income from a number of
different sources and while we are careful to monitor outside activities
we do not have a rule preventing such activities. In other words,
there's no blanket prohibition on BBC presenters having outside writing
commitments.  The issue is more around the content of what they might be
writing. In particular, presenters or reporters should not write columns
on politically controversial subjects in which they express a personal
political opinion or take a side in a politically controversial debate.
I have reviewed the column 

http://blogs.dailyrecord.co.uk/jackiebird/2011/02/claws-come-out-as-top-
cat-larry-makes-ma.html     

I would regard the content as being humorous rather than controversial
or expressing a political opinion.   It is a satirical, light hearted
piece about Larry the Downing Street cat. The references to "Tiger
Salmond" "Tabby Gray" and ""Scrummy, the Scottish Rugby Union's resident
moggie" could not be regarded as serious political comment but more
light hearted fun.  Surely even in the serious business of Scottish
politics it must be important to keep one's sense of humour ?

Needless to say I haven't replied to Mr Duncan's question. Whilst I profoundly disagree with his interpretation that Ms Bird's column is merely light hearted fun. I'm a tad more gobsmacked to discover that the great get out is that our very own Jackie Bird is not a member of the BBC staff and therefore not subject to the same rules and guidelines that might govern other less fiscally rewarded talent.

Now if any of our political parties are slightly taken aback at this relevation, I would hope that some smart but lowly paid bod is currently hot footing it to the Freedom of Information guidleines and determining just how much money Jackie Bird is paid out of public funds as a freelance journalist and broadcaster, oh and also asking Mr Duncan how many other people in the on-air 'Talent' pool are paid on a freelance basis. I'd also be interested to know just how much David Robertson was paid in compensation to stop him talking about the alleged spats between him and his older then co-anchor...

The last thing I want is for Ms Bird to vanish from our screens in a David  Robertson 'get it round ye' hissy fit style. Now naturally if her contract were to mysteriously end overnight and one of those bright young avaricious talents like 2007 Labour list candidate Catriona Renton or the rather delightfully gothic and eligible Catriona Shearer were to take her place, I'd still look forward to seeing her at the plethora of after dinner engagements which she habitually attends for money. I'm sure the nation would be up in arms at the loss of this latter day Our Lady of St Mary Marquis...

Stick this up your European coefficient.

The Scottish Cup, is the oldest trophy in the world, being minted in 1873, the year Queens Park FC defeated Clydesdale FC 2-0 at Hampden in front of 2,500 bunnet waving connoiseurs of the beautiful game. Apart from the inter-war years of 1914-1918 and 1939-1945, the cup has only once, never been awarded.

That was 102 years ago next month. When those arrivistes in the Scottish game, Rangers FC and Celtic FC, competing in the final against each other for what was only the fourth time in the Cups thirty-six year history, petitioned the SFA not to award the cup following mass riots after a 2-2 draw on April 10th and a 1-1 draw in the subsequent replay the following week.

Paranoia, the word bandied about as a slur today, was the phrase of the day. Rumours swept Glasgow that the cheapskate suits at Park Gardens had fixed both ties in order to fill their pockets from the gate receipts.To give you a feel for the time, the Childrens Act 1908 came into effect the day after the first match 11th of April when the wishy washy Liberal government abolished hanging for under 16's and restricted access to booze and smokes for the under 14's...

Back to the game, as the players trooped off the field after 90 minutes of humphing a heavy wet leather ball about, the SFA announced there would be no extra time and a third replay would be required to determine the winners. Cue 60,000 supporters losing their collective stiff upper lip, unbuttoning their toppermost collars, ruffling their carefully pomaded hair and getting right stuck into each other with a mass bout of fisticuffs and ungentlemanly behaviour. By 7.30 pm, both sets of fans had torn up the goalposts, molested the sacred turf and set fire to the pay booths and sturdy security handrails. The beloved Glasgow polis astride their magnificent horses weighed in with their truncheons in an effort to conclude matters efficaciously , they were repelled by a volley of broken kerbstones and sticks made from goal posts. Undeterred the authorities sent in the fire brigade, same result expect they left without their hoses.The body count as the rioters left Hampden and headed into town was fifty polis with a variety of biffed ears, bashed skulls, broken limbs and a unified loss of innocence.

The SFA abandoned the tie, withheld awarding the trophy and handed out not one medal. Celtic and Rangers were awarded £150 in compensation and Queens Park a back hander of £500 to err rebuild the stadium.
One outraged gentleman of Milngavie writing in the letters pages of the Glasgow Evening Times harrumphed,  "I would suggest the withdrawal of all policemen from football matches, and substitute a regiment of soldiers with fixed bayonets." Given that the British Army used gatling guns against the crowd at Croke Park a decade later, the above correspondents suggestion was probably given weighty consideration.

All of which neatly brings us up today's- cue drumroll- SUMMIT!! As we all know his royal Eckness in the face of unrelenting pressure from First Minister-in-waiting Iain Grey finally relented and decided to do something about Scotland's shame...ooh wait, no I've got that wrong, Iain Gray wanted to talk about a fiendishly successful event from two years ago that wrought a ratio of £24 pounds return out of every £1.00 of public money spent. It was Ma Broon, who sensibly asked the FMQ question about what the Tartan Overlord was going to do about it!

There have been a plethora of outraged letters, blogs, articles and no doubt missives from beyond the grave as to why this has nothing to do with politics, why it's footballs problem, there's no such thing as sectarianism in Scotland and we're all barabarians who should be kept at bayonets length whilst collecting around an association regulation sized football...

Well straighten my moustache and call me Wilfred, if I haven't gone and thought up a solution that improves our global image, strengthens the competitiveness of our game and saves teams across the land from going the way of Third Lanark and Clydebank.

Other countries have no problems with fining, deducting points or relegating their biggest teams when they've transgressed, broken the rules, brought misconduct to the games, bribed referees etcetera. I suggest both Celtic and Rangers for crimes, present, past and future be relegated to Division Three alongside previous Scottish Cup winners, Clyde and Queens Park. Ensure there is a booze free exclusion zone around those clubs and in order to make it fair on the rest of the division, I suggest both sides start  their league campaign adrift at the very bottom with minus 25 points, as happened to poor wee Dundee for the crime of entering administration. I wonder how their debts compare to the combined Auld Firm fiscal delinquency?


So let's imagine in my fantasy football world a Scottish premier league without either of these Glasgow sides. A more equitable slice of television revenues spread between the remaining teams, a more competitive league, not dependent on the three young diddies rule aka less foreign players on squigillion pounds per year, family friendly clubs representing their own country in Europe, imagine it Scottish teams playing under the Saltire when getting humped on foreign fields, rather the flags of Ireland and England. Oh and considerably less debt for those trying to keep up with the tsunami of credit card football funding emanating from both sides the Clyde...


There's also the consideration that away days for the faithful to such far flung places as Berwick, Stranraer, Elgin and err Coatbridge just might be enough to strip the hard core bigots and troublemakers away from both teams, obviously this would add to their arduous ferry and plane travelling arrangements...As I say fantasy football, but what other situation will make these two teams face up to their responsibilities? How long will their friends in the media continue to deny that the Auld Firm brand is toxic, that there very existence holds Scotland back. Sure friendly rivalry is good for competition, but when you're talking about two teams who live a couple of miles apart and foster 'fans' from around the world who are asked to overlook the bigotry on both sides, then enough is enough.

What have the SNP ever done for us?

I was a wee bitty concerned when Stewart asked me to write a  piece for Caledonian Mercury about my thoughts on what the other parties' weaknesses are vis-a-vis the SNP. A dull thud in the back of my head pounded out the question, why me? Paranoia kicked in. Was I leaving myself open for a kicking from the plethora of dribbling sockpuppets that infest the Scotsman comments undergrowth and who occasionally slither over to the Cal Merc board? Probably. Would it bother me? Yawn. Was I expected to put the boot into the Tartan Overlord after he joined Labour in devoting an entire FMQ to little old me and my wayward keyboard ways? Nope, I’ve had loads of opportunities to do so in the Cheesy blog and haven’t felt the need to bellow half-naked from the rooftops, yet. Would I take the opportunity to do a Crichton/McKenna like fluff job on the SNP leader. As if.

So dear reader, in order to avoid a spiral of paranoid stupidity, I decided to ruminate on where Scotland is today and why we should all be fearful of mediocrity.  

The vintage age of fifty is approaching me like a joyriders stolen Suburu hurtles towards a bumbling blue bottles backside. There’s no way to avoid the impending thud of this date, so like the leisurely feller I am, I tend to find myself taking a dawdle down memory lane, wearing comfortable brogues and idly twirling my moustache, where like a chap who had a good war, I wallow in the fading glow of nostalgia.

I belong to that generation of Python heads who at the merest mention of the word ‘blessed’ can rattle off the sermon on the mound scene from the ‘Life of Brian’. I spent the early eighties living in the schizophrenic environs of west end Glasgow. On one hand, it was the enlightened city that saw culture as a great regenerating force that created Mayfest and brought Peter Brooks Mahabarata to a freezing cold tram depot. On t’other the venerable city fathers embraced their dark fearful side and prohibited screenings of the above mentioned film, lest wit and sacrilegious thought infested the city youths. Like North Africans and Arabs have taken to Twitter and Facebook to express themselves, early eighties Pythonians would furtively gather in basement flats of an unemployable afternoon and engage in the nefarious act of listening to and reciting the long player soundtrack of the film. I still have the somewhat faded vinyl album, complete with closing hymn, which all these years on reminds me of our venerable opposition in Scotland. ‘All Things Dull and Ugly.’

The one sketch that resonates to this day is, “What Have the Romans Ever Done For Us?” The debate between the Peoples Front of Judea as they discuss life in Judea before the arrival of the Romans. It’s a bit like watching the weekly ordeal of FMQ. The opposition parties are convinced that the SNP government have done nothing for them and their constituents these past four years. Until a wee voice at the back of the mind of the most impartial viewer pops up and says. ‘The aqueduct’?

So apart from the Aqueduct what have the SNP ever done for us?

How about these for starters?

·        

   Delivered an extra 1,000 police officers

·       Crime in Scotland has fallen to 32-year low

·       Scottish Knife Crime at a 10 Year Low

·       Gun crimes falling to a 10-year low

·       Keeping open local accident and emergency units as promised

·       Prescription charges cut dramatically and about to be abolished

·       Removed the tolls on all of Scotland's roads and bridges

·       A record number of modern apprenticeships

·       Reversed a decade of decline in international educational comparisons

·       Increased payments for free personal and nursing care

·       Helped 70,000 small businesses with the small business bonus

·       Oh and of course frozen the council tax for the last four years.

I could quite easily fill the page with other achievements both small and large that make a difference in every day Scotland, but that’s not my job.

The opposition parties in their effort to contain the fiendishly successful machinations of the Scottish government have gone out of their way to put party before country. Legislation for the betterment of all has been brought to a shuddering halt by the spending power of the vested interests. Those same parties who swear to their dying breath a desire to save small Scottish business, now nestle comfortably in the comfy pockets of the supermarket billionaires.  

Therefore I’m more interested in, ‘What the SNP could have done for us, but were stopped from doing.’

The opposition parties block vote against the introduction of a minimum unit price for alcohol, has potentially cost Scotland’s health and wealth a fortune.

There is as we all recognize a booze culture in Scotland where our youngsters indulge in necking the cheap supermarket stuff at home before going out clubbing or pubbing, thus avoiding the high prices often found at said establishments.

Having imbibed to beyond sufficiency, they then indulge in post entertainment ribaldry and japes which more than often involves vandalism, pissing in shop doorways and vomiting in no-longer-working public fountains. Attempts at back alley amour usually end up with further exchanges of bodily fluids, just not the intended ones. This usually results in raised emotions, tempers are frayed and some poor blighter's son or daughter ends up with a smashed bottle being ground into their previously unblemished faces.

The 'harder' type will of course endeavour to display his weaponry skills and often sever a companion’s major artery resulting in massive loss of blood. The resulting costs in police, ambulance, nurse, doctor, mortuary, undertaker and social worker services are of course perfectly acceptable when balanced against the 'do-gooders' attempt to curb excessive alcohol consumption.

Here's a stat for you, in dearest Dumfropolis 92 % of all ambulance calls on Friday evening, Saturday evening and Sunday morning are booze related. So if your child turns blue and stops breathing in their cot on a Friday night or your husband clutches his left arm, turns puce and plants his face in the G-plan glass coffee table, chances are your ambulance crew are going to be a bit late getting too him or her, because they're currently trying to peel a shit, piss and puke encrusted half-dressed teenager off a precinct floor, whilst their mates wail, moan or jeer along.

Naturally, those lovable rapscallions are only expressing their right to go out on the lash and anyone from 'big brother' or the preferred 'nanny state' government that tells them they can't do that, can like go forth and procreate, right. However, the facts exist that money spent on mopping up the mess caused by cheap booze means there is less money to go round on things like nurses, doctors, specialists, ambulances, hospitals, GP's etcetera. But hey, don't let that bother you. Labour, the Lib Dems and the Tories, those supine friends of the supermarket lobby voted against legislation that allows our kids to go right on swallowing that Carlsberg special brew, White lightning and delightful tonic wine Buckfast until their little livers pack in.

The reality is there hasn’t been an effective opposition in Holyrood. The Greens have grown from being the curly haired scamps that everyone had a fondness for, into belligerent teens that’ll huff and puff and throw a hissy fit until every house in the land has loft insulation made from kitten fur. Spurned at Budget time, they now coyly bat their eyelids in the direction of Labour. The co-joined twins of the Tories and Lib Dems are fused at the hip in Westminster, similarly so in Holyrood. You’ll rarely hear a Tory slam a Lib Dem or vice versa. Prior to last year’s Westminster election they reserved their bile equally for the SNP and Labour.

No, the real opposition in Scotland relies on the concerted efforts of the Labour group of MSPs and their friends both North and South of the border in state broadcasting and their pro-Union mouthpiece chums in the dying tree press.

Here SNP achievements are twisted, distorted, partially reported or taken out of context. Hypocrisy and deceit have become central to the very being of the Labour party in Scotland. The SNP are talking about revolution, the Lib Dems, Tories & Greens devolution, whilst Labour still ponders over the benefits of evolution.

Civic Scotland has become infested with Labour placeman. There’s barely a council in the land where members of the senior management aren’t either married, related or in a relationship with members of the Labour party. This isn’t the party that looks after their voter’s -- they simply look after their own. Much like we require applicants who plan to work with children and vulnerable adults to undergo a Disclosure Scotland check maybe it’s time to apply something similar to the various HR departments across the public paid estate, where placemen become agent provocateurs…

Yet despite this, the Tartan Overlord and crew continue in their cheery positive way, ignoring the negative, not wallowing in the politics of character assassination. This does not always endear them to their supporters, who sometimes want to see some backbone, a flash of teeth and a bit of forcing the lies and the hypocrisy back into the lying liars mouths…But, if truth be told, the Salmond mantra of positivity is working. He’s got it right. His example puts the old adage about politicians of ‘they’re all the same’ into a fresh perspective.

At the last election the SNP were elected for a number of reasons, malaise with the bright shiny right wing party that Tony Blair had created, a deeply unpopular war predicated on lies, but above all else the SNP benefitted from Labours failure to improve the significant problems our country faced, does its election campaign today suggest that they have the policies to do so now? It’s as if time has stood still and they’ve settled into a default setting of carping and girning like a petulant child. Labour’s London handlers must be looking askance at the collapse of Fianna Fail across the Irish Sea and fearing the worst.

Today, it looks as if people in Scotland have woken up to the fact that the past four years of relentless negativity from the Labour party has shown that they have not matured as a socially progressive party, their failure to cast aside tribalism to vote for the common good, declares them to be as extinct as a parrot what has joined the choir invisible.

Oh and there's this.....




and the rest from http://www2.snp.org/


We have frozen Council Tax for four years, saving an average family more than £300.

We’ve slashed or abolished business rates for some 80,000 small firms and local employers, protecting jobs in tough times.

We’ve put 1,000 more police on Scotland’s streets, helping drive crime down to its lowest level for 32 years.

We’ve abolished prescription charges, saving people with long-term illnesses an average of more than £180.

The National Conversation launched in 2007 revived progress on the constitutional debate in Scotland, and paves the way for an independence referendum in the next parliament.

We’ve restored free higher education by ruling out upfront fees and abolishing the £2,300 graduate endowment - a back door tuition fee.

We’re delivering a record-breaking 25,000 modern apprenticeships in the year ahead – a two-thirds increase on 2007.

We’ve transformed Scotland into a world leader in green energy, consenting a record 39 new renewable projects since we came to office – more than double the previous administration.

Our £10 million Saltire Prize for marine energy innovation is establishing Scotland at the forefront of this global renewable technology.

We’ve removed tolls on the Forth and Tay Bridges, saving commuters £184 a year on crossing the Tay, and £207 a year on crossing the Forth.

We’ve kept healthcare local. That means A&E units have been saved, children’s cancer services and neurosurgery units protected, and maternity units kept open.

We have provided vital support for the staging of two of the world’s greatest sporting events here in Scotland in 2014 – the Commonwealth games in Glasgow and the Ryder Cup at Gleneagles. This includes the building of a new National Indoor Sports Arena and the Sir Chris Hoy Velodrome.

We’ve started 24,000 social sector homes since coming into office in 2007 – that’s an average of 115 new houses every week.

We’ve helped some of the world’s poorest people by doubling the international development budget and protecting that aid from UK cuts.

We’ve delivered smaller government, including fewer ministers and departments, saving more than £4 million over the parliamentary term.

We’ve provided funding to secure the Dundee V&A museum, the new Bannockburn visitor centre, and the creation of the Robert Burns Birthplace Museum in Ayrshire.

We’ve provided extra funding for Scotland’s veteran charities, and ensured our ex-service men and women receive priority treatment in the NHS and other services.

We’ve established Creative Scotland as a single, national body for the arts, culture and creative industries.

We’ve protected spending in the NHS with an extra £1.2 billion to health boards over the last four years to safeguard frontline services – and we will continue to protect the health budget.

We’ve abolished hidden waiting lists, and reduced hospital waiting lists to a record low.

We’ve increased the number of nurses, doctors and dentists working in the NHS – and we are reducing the number of senior managers by a quarter.

There are 1,000 more cleaners in the health service, helping ensure infection in Scottish hospitals is now at an all-time low.

We’ve set up a tough new inspectorate to ensure that our hospitals are clean.

We’ve banned irresponsible alcohol discounts in supermarkets and off licences.

We’ve made sure our older generation is properly cared for by increasing payments for free personal and nursing care for the first time since it was introduced.

We’ve delivered on our ambitious cancer target which means treatment begins within one month of a decision to treat.

We are building the £840 million new South Glasgow Hospital.

We’ve cut the risk from cervical cancer for the next generation of young women by providing the HPV vaccine for girls in S2.

One million more Scots are registered with NHS dentists under the SNP Government.

We’ve delivered a new dental school in Aberdeen.

We’ve frozen bonuses to NHS consultants.

We’ve made sure more GP practices are open in the evenings and at weekends.

We’ve abolished charges at all NHS-run hospital car parks.

We’ve introduced a Patient Rights Act to provide new statutory rights for all those using the health service.

We’ve given the public a direct say in the NHS by introducing pilot elections in two health boards.

We’re working for a healthier Scotland by raising the legal age for buying tobacco to 18.

We’ve delivered more than 40,000 new heating systems and helped Scots on low incomes to reduce energy costs and keep their homes warm.

We’ve enabled councils to build new homes for the first time in years, providing funding for 3,300 new council houses.

We’ve reformed the Right to Buy in order to protect social housing for rent.

We’ve helped over 5,300 people buy their first home with our shared equity scheme.

We’ve helped 10,000 pensioners and families secure £1.6 million in savings through our benefits health check.

We’ve invested £17 million in the establishment of world class multi-sport facilities at Aberdeen Sports Village, Toryglen Regional Indoor Football Training Centre, and Ravenscraig Sports Centre.

We’ve invested £7.5 million to improve our medal hopes in 2012 and 2014 with World Class facilities for training for our elite and emerging athletes.

We’ve delivered the smallest average primary school class sizes ever, and set a new legal limit of 25 pupils for primary one.

Since the last election, 330 schools will have been built or refurbished - 80 more than planned by Labour.

We have lifted over 130,000 pupils out of crumbling school buildings.

We’ve raised standards in schools by introducing the new Curriculum for Excellence.

We’ve increased funding for college bursaries to a record £89 million, supporting a record 42,000 students.

We’ve expanded free nursery education, benefitting 100,000 children.

We’ve given legal protection to rural schools, preventing unnecessary closure.

We’re helping less well-off youngsters by continuing the £30-a-week Educational Maintenance Allowance – now scrapped in England.

We’ve introduced tough new qualifications – the Scottish Baccalaureate – in science and languages, challenging the brightest pupils to achieve more.

We’ve helped 250,000 people expand their learning with Individual Learning Accounts to pay for training courses.

We’ve extended free school meals to 55,000 children from lower income families.

We’ve helped home-grown talent perform in Edinburgh with a £6 million Expo Fund for the City’s festivals.

We’ve reformed the unique and successful Children’s Hearing System to make it fit for the future.

We’ve made sure children who need additional support to learn get the help they need with new laws and guidance for all schools.

More than 2,600 primary children are now able to learn in dedicated Gaelic language classes, up by a fifth since 2007.

We’ve protected more than 15,000 jobs in Scotland during the recession, including by accelerating spending on nearly £350 million of public projects as part of our comprehensive Economic Recovery Plan.

We’ve put Scotland on course to exceed our interim target of 31 per cent of Scotland’s electricity from clean green renewable sources this year. And we’re on track for 80 per cent by 2020.

The approval we’ve given for a desperately needed new Forth Road Bridge will ease congestion, cut journey times, boost business and secure some 3,000 jobs.

We’ve delivered an extra £2.3 billion for jobs and public services by driving up efficiency in government – far exceeding the target of 1.5% efficiency savings.

We’ve established a £10 million national life sciences institute in Dundee.

We’ve funded improvements to major roads across the country including the M8, the M80, the A9, A90 and A96. We’re also completing the M74 - bringing new jobs and helping local regeneration.

We’ve protected Scotland’s pensioners from UK cuts by guaranteeing free bus travel, and we are extending the scheme to injured veterans.

We’ve successfully completed one of the largest rail projects in Scotland for decades, with the opening of the Airdrie-Bathgate rail line.

We’ve helped tourism and the local economy in the Western Isles through a pilot scheme to reduce ferry fares.

We’ve funded improvements in rail services and journey times from Inverness, Aberdeen, Dundee and Perth to Glasgow and Edinburgh.

We’ve invested £2.4 billion in improving the nation’s water infrastructure, and published proposals to boost the role of Scottish Water, publicly owned for the public benefit.

We’re on track to slash the number of quangos by more than a quarter.

We’ve established Public Contracts Scotland, a website that makes it easier than ever for small businesses to access government contacts.

We’ve invested £2 million in small post offices, helping 49 businesses expand and stay open.

We have established the Scottish Investment Fund to help grassroots business projects get up and running.

We’ve reformed Scottish Enterprise so that it focuses on growth sectors, growth markets and growth companies – boosting key industries such as renewables, financial services and life sciences.

We delivered Scotland’s first ever year of Homecoming in 2009, encouraging more than 95,000 visitors to travel to Scotland and exceeding its target by generating £53.7 million in additional tourism revenue.

Violent crime is down by over a fifth since the SNP came to office, with nearly 3,000 fewer violent offences last year.

We’ve used over £30 million seized from criminal behaviour to invest in community projects for over 300,000 Scottish kids.

Fear of crime has fallen – and the risk of becoming a victim of crime continues to fall, and is lower than south of the Border.

Knife crime is down by 30 per cent since this government took office, but we must and will step up efforts to keep driving this figure down.

We’ve delivered faster justice, with three-quarters of cases completed within six months – compared to only two-thirds in 2006/07. And criminals are being locked up for longer, with prison sentences at their longest for a decade.

We’ve put in place new measures to cut the cycle of re-offending with tough community punishment.

We’ve reformed the laws on sexual offences to make it easier to prosecute people for serious sexual attacks.

We’ve increased funding for Victim Support Scotland, and our victim notification scheme is helping people affected by crime.

We’re tackling Scotland’s drug problem head-on through our national drugs commission, the new national drugs strategy, and 20 per cent more funding to help people recover from addiction.

We’ve provided parents with more information on dangerous paedophiles to protect children in local communities.

We’ve given the go ahead to a new prison for the North East of Scotland, as part of our prison building programme.

We are building the Gartcosh crime campus, and have established the Serious and Organised Crime Taskforce.

We’ve provided Citizens Advice Scotland with extra funding to provide advice and support to families facing debt problems.

We are reforming the law on Double Jeopardy, to help ensure that the guilty do not escape justice.

We’ve introduced world leading Climate Change legislation to reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 42 per cent by the end of the decade.

We’ve secured £1.6 billion of investment for Scotland’s rural economy through the Scottish Rural Development Programme.

Scotland is clean as well as green - under an SNP Government, recycling is at its highest level ever.

We have developed a non-nuclear energy strategy for Scotland, including working with partners to progress the concept of a European Super Grid to export our surplus power.

We’ve promoted Scotland’s top quality produce – sales of Scottish food and drink have increased by 30 per cent since the SNP came to office.

We’ve helped make our communities safer from flooding with investment in flood defences and new measures in the Flooding Act.

We’ve backed consumers with a continued ban on planting GM crops in Scotland.

We’ve developed Conservation Credits, catch quotas and on-board CCTV, working with fishermen to develop and implement fisheries policies right for the 21st century.

We are the first administration to introduce a scheme dedicated to encouraging new entrants into farming, worth £10 million.

We’ve delivered the Wildlife and Natural Environment Bill, toughening up wildlife crime measures and protecting Scotland’s environment as one of our greatest assets.

We’ve passed a Crofting Reform Act, tackling absenteeism, neglect and speculation to protect crofting for future generations.
With your support we can build on the work of the past four years. Progress has been made and there is more to do. Together, we can make Scotland better.

Living your days in a better nation.

One of the most compelling images conjured up by the revolution in Egypt over the past few days came to me courtesy of an Al Jazeeri reporter on Friday evening who informed his audience, in the wake of Vice President Suleiman's statement that Mubarak had 'waived the presidency', that the news anchors on Egyptian state TV were to be seen smiling broadly. For some reason I found this quite an emotional concept and came gie near wibbly as a result. It's been an emotional rollercoaster watching human dignity stand so steadfast in the face of brutal oppression. Only someone with a heart of flint would fail to be moved by the Channel 4 news interview Jon Snow did with Egyptian human rights activist Dr Hossam Abdalla and his Glasgow born son Khalid Abdalla, the actor from such films as the Kite Runner and Green Zone, who was with the crowd in Tahrir Square.

Therefore, it was interesting to read this morning that one of the first effects, following the collapse of Mubarak, is that State Television and pro-government media have about faced as fast as a Labour MP totalling their expenses column. According to an article on Al Arabiya's website 'State TV and pro-Mubarak newspapers portrayed the hundreds of thousands of protesters as a minority of troublemakers. While raucous protests raged in downtown Cairo, state-run Al-Nil TV showed serene videos of the Nile River.' 

It's rather telling that on the Thursday, 24 hours before the actual day of departure, journalists at the pro-government al-Ahram newspaper, possibly sniffing the fresh air of change, demanded the sacking of their editor and the publishing of a front page apology for their 'unethical coverage'.

All of this got me to thinking about pro-government newspaper mouth pieces and state controlled radio and television and how lucky we are in Scotland to be living in such a free and democratic place, where our media are unfettered from the terrible pressures of oppressive and indulgent forces and report everything fairly with a straight bat. 

Then I sobered up.

No matter which way you look at it, depending on the vagaries of poll results, at the very least one-quarter  to one-third of people living in Scotland believe Scotland should be Independent. Yet this swathe of the electorate are ignored by our state broadcaster and pro-Union mouth-piece media and newspapers. Opponents of Independence have had decades to build up a culture of Union dependence within these vast organisations. Others have pointed out where political allegiances lie in newsrooms across the country, where personal relationships are dismissed as mere tittle tattle. Yet, personally I know of a great number of media people, who are keen on the idea of this illusionary better nation. In a previous career I was the director of a peripatetic film and television festival that drew media practitioners from the 'Celtic' countries to Scotland where they could embrace and celebrate their individuality and differences. Friendships made at the festival still survive some 12 years on, many privately agree with what myself and other Scottish blawgers say about the inherent Labour bias in our media. At least one, senior executive is troubled by the bias his organisation projects on news. Yet, the status quo continues. This week has seen Iain Gray go into hiding, the gray pimpernel is nowhere to be found, obviously our unbiased journalists have looked everywhere to ask him the simple question of, when he was first made aware that Labour in London were 'actively facilitating' the return of el-Megrahi to Libya? 

Only one journalist found him, the Observers Kevin McKenna, who must surely buy his mouthwash in bulk, has penned the most ridiculous hagiography since the publication of 'Mugabe: My Misunderstood Years.' If you can bare the indignity of a professional journalist becoming a porn fluffer then read on.  

Personally, I'm looking for more than Jackie Bird dropping her folksy-grinning-everything's-alright-go-back-to-sleep routine and go into a prophetic Howard Beale rant-a-thon as in 'Network'.