That was 102 years ago next month. When those arrivistes in the Scottish game, Rangers FC and Celtic FC, competing in the final against each other for what was only the fourth time in the Cups thirty-six year history, petitioned the SFA not to award the cup following mass riots after a 2-2 draw on April 10th and a 1-1 draw in the subsequent replay the following week.
Paranoia, the word bandied about as a slur today, was the phrase of the day. Rumours swept Glasgow that the cheapskate suits at Park Gardens had fixed both ties in order to fill their pockets from the gate receipts.To give you a feel for the time, the Childrens Act 1908 came into effect the day after the first match 11th of April when the wishy washy Liberal government abolished hanging for under 16's and restricted access to booze and smokes for the under 14's...
Back to the game, as the players trooped off the field after 90 minutes of humphing a heavy wet leather ball about, the SFA announced there would be no extra time and a third replay would be required to determine the winners. Cue 60,000 supporters losing their collective stiff upper lip, unbuttoning their toppermost collars, ruffling their carefully pomaded hair and getting right stuck into each other with a mass bout of fisticuffs and ungentlemanly behaviour. By 7.30 pm, both sets of fans had torn up the goalposts, molested the sacred turf and set fire to the pay booths and sturdy security handrails. The beloved Glasgow polis astride their magnificent horses weighed in with their truncheons in an effort to conclude matters efficaciously , they were repelled by a volley of broken kerbstones and sticks made from goal posts. Undeterred the authorities sent in the fire brigade, same result expect they left without their hoses.The body count as the rioters left Hampden and headed into town was fifty polis with a variety of biffed ears, bashed skulls, broken limbs and a unified loss of innocence.
The SFA abandoned the tie, withheld awarding the trophy and handed out not one medal. Celtic and Rangers were awarded £150 in compensation and Queens Park a back hander of £500 to err rebuild the stadium.
One outraged gentleman of Milngavie writing in the letters pages of the Glasgow Evening Times harrumphed, "I would suggest the withdrawal of all policemen from football matches, and substitute a regiment of soldiers with fixed bayonets." Given that the British Army used gatling guns against the crowd at Croke Park a decade later, the above correspondents suggestion was probably given weighty consideration.
All of which neatly brings us up today's- cue drumroll- SUMMIT!! As we all know his royal Eckness in the face of unrelenting pressure from First Minister-in-waiting Iain Grey finally relented and decided to do something about Scotland's shame...ooh wait, no I've got that wrong, Iain Gray wanted to talk about a fiendishly successful event from two years ago that wrought a ratio of £24 pounds return out of every £1.00 of public money spent. It was Ma Broon, who sensibly asked the FMQ question about what the Tartan Overlord was going to do about it!
There have been a plethora of outraged letters, blogs, articles and no doubt missives from beyond the grave as to why this has nothing to do with politics, why it's footballs problem, there's no such thing as sectarianism in Scotland and we're all barabarians who should be kept at bayonets length whilst collecting around an association regulation sized football...
Well straighten my moustache and call me Wilfred, if I haven't gone and thought up a solution that improves our global image, strengthens the competitiveness of our game and saves teams across the land from going the way of Third Lanark and Clydebank.
Other countries have no problems with fining, deducting points or relegating their biggest teams when they've transgressed, broken the rules, brought misconduct to the games, bribed referees etcetera. I suggest both Celtic and Rangers for crimes, present, past and future be relegated to Division Three alongside previous Scottish Cup winners, Clyde and Queens Park. Ensure there is a booze free exclusion zone around those clubs and in order to make it fair on the rest of the division, I suggest both sides start their league campaign adrift at the very bottom with minus 25 points, as happened to poor wee Dundee for the crime of entering administration. I wonder how their debts compare to the combined Auld Firm fiscal delinquency?
So let's imagine in my fantasy football world a Scottish premier league without either of these Glasgow sides. A more equitable slice of television revenues spread between the remaining teams, a more competitive league, not dependent on the three young diddies rule aka less foreign players on squigillion pounds per year, family friendly clubs representing their own country in Europe, imagine it Scottish teams playing under the Saltire when getting humped on foreign fields, rather the flags of Ireland and England. Oh and considerably less debt for those trying to keep up with the tsunami of credit card football funding emanating from both sides the Clyde...
There's also the consideration that away days for the faithful to such far flung places as Berwick, Stranraer, Elgin and err Coatbridge just might be enough to strip the hard core bigots and troublemakers away from both teams, obviously this would add to their arduous ferry and plane travelling arrangements...As I say fantasy football, but what other situation will make these two teams face up to their responsibilities? How long will their friends in the media continue to deny that the Auld Firm brand is toxic, that there very existence holds Scotland back. Sure friendly rivalry is good for competition, but when you're talking about two teams who live a couple of miles apart and foster 'fans' from around the world who are asked to overlook the bigotry on both sides, then enough is enough.
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8 comments:
Mark
An entertaining read.
But in short I think your complaint is the Old firm are too successful in Scotland.
Indeed, part of the Old firm "problem" is that the rest of our clubs are so crap - so the rivalry, based historically on religion and the reality of sharing the same city is magnified by the fact that in competitive term they are the only teams that count. And of course all those Old firm cup finals. If only the Jambos an co wernt so hopelessly rubbish wed reduce the sheer number of cruch Old firm clashes overnight
Indeed I blame Scotland's other teams - or certainly Scotland's other three big cities for being so mince. Why are the two Edinburgh "giants" so tiny compared to say Newcastle FC - a smaller and poorer city barely an hour down the road?. Or Aberdeen - with all that oil money and a huge hinterland - as pish as say Sheffield Wednesday?
If these clubs were any better maybe Rangers and Celtic would forget their ancient rivalries as their current ones were focused elsewhere?.
And deduct them 25 points? They'd still win the SPL
Ban them from Europe? Why - because Hibs cannae qualify any other way?
Scottish football without the Old firm? Try the League of Ireland - half a step up from Scottish Junior football.
Hi Alan, In short you're wrong.
My post isn't about how good or bad the other teams are, or how much debt they should carry to compete. It's about the fact that as long as Rangers and Celtic remain as the ultra dominant force, the rest of Scottish football will be kept down as feeder clubs doing their best to avoid bankruptcy and Scottish society will continue to be crippled by entropy.
It always struck me as heartening to hear the Motherwell FC chairman John Boyle complain about the buses driving past Fir Park every Saturday afternoon on to the M74 for Ibrox, Parkhead or wherever their away game was that day. I say heartening, because I think he was trying to halt the exodus of Motherwell citizens opting to support a team a couple of miles up the road, based on either their religious belief system or that old whore, glory hunting, rather than support their local team, Motherwell.
Regardless of the ex-pat supporters clubs around the world, the one aspect of Auld Firm support that always intrigues me is the plethora of Auld Firm supporters clubs spread throughout Scotland, ranging from Annan, Stranraer and even as far North as Shetland, these devoted chaps who dilligently follow, follow a team they have no connection with other than the above choices.
Is it because it's easier to support the big team than your small local team, that followers somehow believe they really 'are the people'?
I doubt either one of them would win the SPL if they were deducted 25 points and stuck in the third division...
'Scotland's shame', 'Scots humiliated', 'Scotland disgraced' etc etc ad bloody nauseum.
You'd almost think that feeling ashamed about Scotland was to be encouraged. We certainly seem to revel in getting into the guts of our own ignominiousness.
Watch the fulminating commenters writhing in their righteous indignation and tell me it isn't a slevery orgy of self flagellation. 'We're shite and we know we are' sung euphorically at the point of climax.
Ah, the mindset of the psychologically colonised laid bare.
When was the last time you heard the phrase 'England's shame' in the MSM?
mark - i dont think there is anything intriguing here. They support them because they are good, In the same way as someone in Surrey support Man U.
in scotland our tighter geography makes actually going to matches more practical, and the impact of this on other clubs is greater here due to our smaller population.
I write as a StMirren fan who grew up watch hoards of buddies head for Ibrox oe Parkhead when the Saints were at home. This temporarily stopped when, under Fergie we wee pretty good ( and in a period Ranger were truly mince) with 10,000 plus turning up at Love street pretty regularly. Today we are down to 2,500, reliant on away supporters to fill our new tiny wee ground.
So whose fault is it that StMirren is pish?
I have also sort of voted with my feet. I go more often to Everton these days than anywhere. Does this make me disloyal? I suppose it does. But the buddies product is just so poor.
The Old firm hold no alternative appeal to me, but i don't blame them for putting on an attractive show, getting in to Europe and occasionally playing Barca, and regularly winning league titles.
That this appeals to lots of fellow Scots don't surprise me at all. Indeed I suspect were the two clubs to drop their sectarian baggage once and for all, they would be even more popular - Unless Brian Souter were to waste his millions on StJohnston rather than the nats!! ( only joking here- but you get my drift - were a Sheik to buy Hearts and give a manager 20 million to spend, watch these maroon shirts start appearing even in darkest Larkhall. In Sydney even!)
Golden rule of football and politics? People like winners
I agree that it's about the product. But the product is not simply defined by results. I'm always on the side of the team which plays football in a way that demonstrates that style IS substance. I want to be entertained and winning is not 'the only thing'. That's for the insecure and boorish.
Mark, there is no such thing as the Auld Firm, unless you are partial to the odd pie from Aulds of Greenock...
Rangers and Celtic get such a big support because they enjoy wall to wall coverage in the press and on BBC Scotland. There is a tribal element to it as well, and aspect that might be reduced if we had a government that was prepared to advocate secular schools for all.
I am a regular attender at football matches and my least favourite trip would be to one of the homes of the bigot brothers. In the first division and below, there is very little aggro and generally supporters of both teams get along fine, with a sort of mutual respect for the joint dislike of the OF. There are a few exceptions, the neonazi cesspit that is Airdrie being one, but on the whole going to SFL matches is a fear-free experience.
Rangers and Celtic succeed because they built up their support base on a wave of bigotry which was tacitly accepted and even endorsed, and which they now find hard to shake off completely. They are jointly a cancer on Scottish society.
Alastair
"There is very little aggro and generally supporters of both teams get along fine", at my sons' school football games as well. And the attendances there, quality of play and competitive relevance of these games is almost as high as the average SFL match
And Rangers and Celtic the a"cancer of scottish society" - get a grip here, some sense of perspective.
Celtic FC I would contend is something Scottish society should actually be proud of, try to emulate. A massively popular institution founded by poverty stricken immigrants, and now with a mass appeal well beyond its ethnic base. A club admired internationally, positively liked by the supporters of other clubs
A deservedly great brand.
Rangers much less so - but id still stop well short of calling is "a cancer" How about *a bigger and much more successful version of Airdrie" - and i suspect even that's unfair these days
I disagree with you Mark.You are far too kind to two monsters. Why inflict them on Stranraer, Berwick etc. The old Squirm should be foreclosed and flung out of football....end off.
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