Ashmageddon and beyond

The hyperbole has yet again smashed through the apoplexy barrier with some of the comments and headlines surrounding the eruption of the Eyjafjallajokul volcano, the name still sounds vaguely like a Glaswegian threat to me, 'Aye-ya-fjalla-yokel'. 

There are doom laden predictions of Europe's economy set to be in tatters, it could last years, it's a health risk, we're all going to die etcetera. Most alarming was the news that the precious foods we fly in from the other side of the world, real essentials like fresh pineapple chunks from Ghana and organic baby corn from Thailand are going to rot abroad, our supermarket shelves left bare...

To be honest, I'm loving it. It's like Planet 1 Humans 0. The skies over my house have been beautiful the last couple of days; with no ugly jet trails vandalising my skyline, no Tornado's screaming across the Cairn Valley at 200 feet playing 'Where's Terry Taliban and his ginger Jihadist mates?'

The stories of happy people living beside the big airports describing the joy of being able to enjoy their gardens for the first time without the constant background noise of a plane taking off every 90 seconds has given the poor bastards a taste of the better qualities of life, the way it should be. 

So what if business slows down a bit and people can't travel the world at the same break neck speed we've become used to. Those stuck away from home will get back eventually, just a bit later than they had planned. They'll soon be reminiscing in a spirit of the Blitz stylee, no doubt there's already a flotilla of little ships and windsurfers evacuating the poor folk stranded at Dunkirk with Johnny Foreigner. Surely there's no need for panic over losing contact with loved ones after all, we pride ourselves on living in this instant digital communication age, where we can facebook, twitter, bebo, video-conference, there's an I-phone app for just about everything except for wiping your arse, and no doubt someone's working on the I-wipe. Twitter has already proved helpful, with twitterees arranging lift sharing and bed crashing around the globe, actually bringing cyber chums together in real life!

Maybe the sporadic nature of the volcanoes ash will allow us to start getting a bit more involved with life here. Perhaps we'll start thinking about the inadequacies of our non flight transport infrastructure. Perhaps we could take the entire rail system back into public hands and operate it as a vital community service rather than a publicly subsidised profit machine for fat cat speculators. Let's think about opening up our old sea routes, our trade with Scandinavia and Ireland. Look at the way our communities off the west coast have been allowed to become retirement areas with locals priced out of the market, because the only way in for industry is by single track with passing places B roads, when previously fleets of puffers and steamers operated off the coast and island. What about the idle container ships currently dumped at Loch Striven, how fast can they be put into action to take up the slack of lost Air freight business?

Naturally there are calls for bail outs of the airlines. It didn't happen after the Twin Towers attacks, why should BA, BMI, Virgin et al expect help from the public purse now? Maybe they should consider investing in Helium inflated dirigibles. Greater cargo shifting possibilities, better for the environment, and ideal for leisurely travel. The Germans have been doing it at Friedrichshafen since the days of the Zeppelins, and are working on Airships that are extremely safe, have fantastic potential for lifting all sorts of cargo and people. Then there's the whole unexplored world of the orbital airship.

Aye, things are changing, surely now it's time to kick back and just slow down our lives? We might just enjoy it a little bit more.